Emphasized Welcoming vs. Giving Guests Space :: Why Both are Needed
Every church has specific ways of doing things. Among these specifics are how they interact with visitors. Every good pastor wants to leave a great first impression and create the best possible connection with his guests. In order to do so, it is important that every pastor determines what is the best way to achieve this. There is no cure-all solution. What works for one church may contradict what works for another church. Consider the following, contradictory methods:
#1 Emphasized Welcoming
Christianity Today highlighted an excerpt from their managing editor, Mark Galli’s, new book, Jesus Mean and Wild: The Unexpected Love of an Untamable God. Mark tells the story about his family’s visit to a small, irrelevant church. It was a church where the worship band struggled at times and hit flat notes. Attendance was about 45 people that Sunday, and they certainly did not have all the bells and whistles of “relevant” ministry. But Mark and his family were drawn to this church because Mark believed that “this little fellowship manifested the presence of Jesus in a way that is unique and absolutely necessary in our age.” One reason why is because of how they made his family feel welcome. Before service they were greeted by four people, including the pastor, and afterwards, another five or six people greeted them, including one who invited them to lunch. This small church may have not been cutting edge but they knew how to create relationships and show God’s love.
#2 Giving Guests Space
In contrast, in his book User Friendly Churches George Barna’s research reveals the downsides of showing guests too much attention.
In many stagnant churches, anonymity is next to ungodliness. The underlying assumption is that friendliness and Christian love can only be shown by showering attention on the visitor. The effort is meant to make the person feel welcome and special. Exit interviews, however, indicate that such attention is generally undesired and often causes the visitor to feel violated. In their desire to embrace the newcomer, these churches unwittingly trample the line between a warm welcome and overwhelming, uncomfortable pressure.
Barna goes on to say that leaders of growing churches rely on the congregation to make members feel welcome but not cornered.
So which way is right for your church? Well, both are needed. Not every person who walks through your church doors will have the same temperament and needs. Ideally, your first impressions team would be trained to be able to discern to some extent how each guest wants to be treated. Unfortunately, body language can be misleading and humans can only reasonably discern so much. With that said, your church must choose a general starting point and methodology for reaching your guests. Pray about it. Perhaps the people visiting your church need emphasized welcoming. Perhaps the culture of the community you are trying to reach prefers to be given some space at first.
You need to do whatever method you believe will help you maximize the accomplishment of your vision.
